Julafton/Juldagen

Igår var det Julafton och den spenderade jag med Familj och vänner hos min kärakusin Patricia och henes pojkvän Abbas. Det blev en dag/kväll full med skratt och framför allt god mat.
Jag och Kristian körde igång Kareoke maskinen och det blev ett himla drag i vardagsrummet, inte visst jag att vi alla var sjärnor :) Älskar verkligen min familj, ni är underbar.
Tack för en underbar dag/kväll. Vill också passa på att tacka för alla fina julklappar, älskade dom allihop.

Idag är det juldagen och jag ska snart åka till min gdfar för mer julmat! Hela familjen ska dit och sedan bli det utgång med min bästa vän Isabell och gänget.
Hoppas nästa år fortsätter i samma lyckliga spår.

Ni vet att ni älskar mig
Karoin Chambel

Måndag Kväll...

Herregud, är helt slut. Kom precis ut från duschen.
Men va kul vi hade, allt blev lyckat tillslut, till och med Axel hållde sig från att trampa sönder min fot. Och resten av programet var hur bra som helst.
Rudebeckarna gav verkligen gärnet, tack för en underbar kväll, tack till alla som kom och tittade, och sist men inte minst....

Tack för dansen Axel.

Måndag

Hej!
Idag ska vi ha julshow på Svenska mässan, Vi ska ha lucia tåg och dansa folkdans.
Ska blir sjukt kul. Och ja, vi ska ha folkdräkter på oss, as heta! Hehe
Ihelgen va jag i sthlm hos pappa hade rätt kul, hanna var ju där så vi shoppade hela lördagen och hade det mysigt. Köpte en ny jacka och lite annat.
Men som sagty idag blir det julfest och alla är nog lite nervösa, eftersom alla tjejer i S1a inte kan hela tjejdansen! men vi ska som tur ha repetion om nån timma, inga lektion och det är ju skönt. Även om jag ändå gick upp tidigt för att ha matte!
Men men, det blev en god frukost med morfar på fiket istället och en lite snabb visit hos Camilla. Nu ska ja städa mitt rum och plocka ihop alla saker till i kväll sne åker jag hem till Özum och har julmysigt i julstressen innan det är dags för dans :) haha puss och hej

fortsätning om kvällen kommer....

Onsdag kväll.

Hej,
Har inte skrivit på ett bra tag nu, har lite skuldkänslor men nu är jag igång igen.
Det börjar närma sig slutet på höst terminen och det har hänt en hel del under dom senaste veckorna. I skolan är det lite annorlunda än vad det var i början, man har hittat sina vänner och tappat en hel del andra. Men klassen är fortfarande jätte go. Det ända som just nu håller oss på avstånd från allt det roliga, är allt vi har och göra. Det är sinnessjukt. Min kalender är helt full, när ska jag hinna julhandla?
Just det jag berättade att jag träffat en kille, William. Helt underbar men det blir nog inget lyckligt slut där heller, Vi hade verkligen underbar veckor tillsammans men just en måndag vart allt annorlunda, så blev det lite rörigt. Men nu börjar också allt få sin mening, i fredags fick jag veta att han ska flytta till England. Ja, ni läste rätt England. ! Känslan är obeskrivlig även om jag börjar bli ganska van nu. Kärleken har ända sedan den börja komma in i mitt liv, bara helt plötsligt bara försvunnit utan att jag förstått varför?
Men får väl lära mig detta nu, Love hurts! Även om han ska flytta känns det som om det ska vara vi, som om allt ska ordna sig men det kommer det ju inte göra.
Även om jag önska det...

Men nu måste jag sluta, ska upp tidigt imon, vi har resursdag imon och
vi ska öva inför julfesten, vi ska nämlig dansa folkdans ( fråga inte varför) och ha lucia uppträdande, och så har jag sjukt mycket att plugga till nästa veckas stress-vecka..

God natt på er!

// Chambel


P.s: Ska till pappa i helgen, sjuk roligt den här gången för Hanna ska också upp ! :)

new school.

Jag ahr nyaa börjat på en ny skola. Det är helt underbat, alla nya männsikor och nya vänner. Jag trivs som fisken i vattnet. Och så har ja träffat en väldigt söt pojk, underbar.! :) i try to love agian. :) hope it get better this time. i love my school by the way!

// love karolin

Dear Diary

Dear, dear diary I wanna tell my secrets‘

Cause you‘re the only one that I know will keep them

So this is what I‘ve doneI‘ve been a bad, bad girl for so long

Don‘t know how to change what went wrong

Daddy‘s little girl but he went away

What did it teach me? That love leaves.

best song ever.

I LOVE THIS SONG.

Step one you say we need to talk. He walks you say sit down it‘s just a talk. He smiles politely back at you, You stare politely right on through. Some sort of window to your right as he goes left and you stay right between the lines of fear and blame.You begin to wonder why you came. Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend, Somewhere along in the bitterness and I would have stayed up with you all night. Had I known how to save a life Let him know that you know best cause after all you do know best. Try to slip past his defense without granting innocence. Lay down a list of what is wrong the things you‘ve told him all along and pray to God he hears you. As he begins to raise his voice, you lower yours and grant him one last choice. Drive until you lose the road or break with the ones you‘ve followed. He will do one of two thingshe will admit to everything or he‘ll say he‘s just not the same. And you‘ll begin to wonder why you came. Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend somewhere along in the bitternessAnd I would have stayed up with you all night.
Had I known how to save a life...

cant help my feelings for you

I never felt nothing in the world like this before now I‘m missing you & I‘m wishing that you would come back through my door.Why did you have to go? You could have let me know.So now I‘m all alone, Boy you could have stayed but you wouldnt give me a chance. With you not around it‘s a little bit more then i can stand and all my tears they keep running down my face, Why did you turn away? So why does your pride make you run and hide? Are you that afraid of me? But I know it‘s a lie what you keep inside this is not how you wanted to be. So baby I will wait for you cause I don‘‘t know what else i can do. Don‘t tell me I ran out of time if it takes the rest of my life. If you think I‘m fine it just aint true I really need you in my life. No matter what i have to do I‘ll wait for you. It‘s been a long time since you called me. How could you forget about me? You got me feeling crazy. How can you walk away, Everything stays the same I just can‘t do it baby. What will it take to make you come back? Boy I told you what it is & it just ain‘t like that. Why can‘t you look at me, your still in love with me! Don‘t leave me crying. Baby why can‘t we just start over again, get it back to the way it was. If you give me a chance I can love you right but your telling me it wont be enough. So why does you pride make you run & hide. Thats not how you wanted to be. Baby

I will wait for you if it‘s the last thing i do

Crying for you.

I was Cryin‘ when I met you

Now I‘m tryin‘ to forget you

Your love is sweet misery

I was Cryin‘ just to get you

Now I‘m dyin‘ ‘cause I let youDo what you do to me‘

Cause what you got inside

Ain‘t where your love should stay

Yeah, our love, sweet love, ain‘t love‘

Til you give your heart away
ill never make the same mistake again..

you had a good girl.

Somehow I sit here, and I think about it, Who needs love, before they been without it. When I met you, I didn‘t wanna let you in, but you did something to me you took my hand.You told me you would never do me wrong, that what we could have together will be so strong and that you never let go. But then how could you take my heart and run, I was so mistreated. I thought you could be the one, You were all I needed, you made me feel happy. Babe, you had a good girl, I would give you the world even all the stars above. I wanted to give you my love, all of my love but i dident have the time. And now no matter how hard I try to fight it, you are still there.When I remember what you did, when you run away. I hate myself for believing in what you said, I put my trust in you, I gave my own to you and now In the end there‘s no more left. I was that girl how would never leave your side.

You had a good girl but you let her slip away

Why is it that everytime I looked in your eyes I see something wrong, insecurity, When all along I been trying make it right, loving you faithfully. But now i`m going to stop I cant wait for you.

I have to move on now, sorry!

- Fairytales don‘t always have a happy ending, do they?

I‘m gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket,

But Ive got to get a move on with my life.

Its time to be a big girl now,

And big girls don‘t cry.

I tried to be there for you, but you wouldn’t let me in. I wish that i can be a mindreader so that i could understand whats going on in your head, you cant se me because you are not ready you say but dosent that mean that you did care! okey maby our relationskip wasent as good as it could be but then we dident make it as good we wanted it to be. I know that and thats why it hurts because i know you wanted it, you told me that and i know why it dident happend but i cant tell you because your aren`t here!

We are looking for perfect surrounded by artificial, baby understand. And this can only be as good as we both make it I guess sometimes its gonna hurt.

saknaden.

Ibland vaknar jag mitt i natten av kylan att du inte ligger bredvid. Vill att du ska hålla om mig, och jag vill kunna leka med ditt hår. Ser på andra och när dom har sina stunder, och vet att vi kunde haft det lika bra, du och jag. Saknar dig så mycket att jag nästan bara vill ta en taxi hem till dig och säga hur ja känner, men det hade inte spelat någon roll nu, nu när det är försent. Vill att allt ska vara som förr att jag kan vakna upp av ett gulligt sms eller somna till din röst, Sova tätt in till dig höra hur ditt hjärta slår. Vill uppleva det med dig igen allt det vi gjorde och allt vi kan göra. Du kommer alltid finnas kvar, för du är den enda mitt hjärta kunde banka för.

JAG SAKNAR DIG!.

thinling of you agian.

I think of you sometimes, and i always ending up were we could be, we were going to do so mutch, we had so many plans, but now it is all gone. And i`m here whit my phone in my hand i want to call you but i know that when i here your voice i will be speachless. Why cant my heart just be on broken.

It is true.

I feel like someting is missing, like a big black hole in my heart. It is because of you , of what you did, even if you dident do so mutch. But the fact that you dident do anyting, you just left becuse you wanted to have fun on your little trip. Wish we could switch up the roles And I could be that persen who just dont give a shit. Be the one who says when you call that you are out somewere having fun and cant talk. Dont take this wrong cuz i can have fun without you to, but the thing is i dont put it in your face that i been out party untill 7 in the morning just to make you sad, but i wish that i could do that but i cant I`m to nice, i dont want to hurt anyone even if you say it dosnt hurt you, i know it dose. Everthing was so good before you were leving for this trip and i know it is just becuse of that, whay we are not together now. I wanted to be with you day and night, just to be by your side so that i could show you that I care, and still i know that my love is real and my feelings pure, so if you would just forget about being prod and say that you wanted to try agian, i know that i will let you in, even if you were the only one that hurt me. You dont even need to ask me why, you know how i feel. Because I know, it‘s true, I‘m still in love with you.

I cant wait.

I`m going to Portugal soon I hope. I just whant to get away from this place, from this weather and from all the bull shit thats goes around. And i will soon be on my way to my paradise. And i just cant wait. I want to fall asleep and then wake up in my bed over there.

Think twice.

Think twice before you say your words. It may dont be the words you want to say.

Hide what your thinking.

Thats whats almost every people try to do, try to hide what they rellay feel inside. Yes that is someting you do if you dont know the persen or if it someting that is really personal. But then it is people like you who feel in one way and show another. But not becuse it hurt to tell the trut but becuse you whant to be proad and dont show that you really are weak. Okay maby you dont love me but you still care and i can tell it even if we dont speak that mutch anymore. Like when my friend talk to you and you asked if she was with me, and she wasent so you started to ask were i were and when she said that i was in an other city at a party you suddenly changed you way of talking. I know you care and if it is so hard for you to show that to me whay do you even talk about me to people that know me to. I care about you even if we dont date anymore. But the diffrent beteen us is that im not to prod to show it. You are a wonderful persen in your ways but then you have a side that i dident se before now. And i dont like it. You know even if im at a party dosent it mean that im with someone else i still love you i do so i promes that i will respekt you and wait. but the question is if you will respekt my feelings to. Becuse even if you and me are`t we anymore we still care and we still have someting but just not the same as it was before you run away. And that isn`t someting that i think to make me feel better that s someting you and I show but in different ways of doing it.

// karolin

Goodbye My lover.

My feeling is so diffrent then before, like you I really do, but then also I know all the things you did and that make me think that maby this is the best for now, i will always remeber you, your smile, you eyes, you cute face when you have that energi at 6 in the morning, Your blue walls in your room, your famaily, Your bed, and i will never forget how you made me feel. I know it wasent perfekt but god made so many obstacle in our way. So how could it be perfekt if we havent walkt over them get. If we would do that then i think we could bilt something beautiful as you said, but you also said that you never let me go and you did so i cant belive your words but even do they will always be somewere in my heart, You made so mutch so easy and so hard at the same time. You did so many things that hurt me and still i`m writing this. That have to mean something, maby that you are special. i hope that some day we could be friend like we were becuse even if i can`t have you as a lover I want you as one of my friend. Goodbye my lover. // Karolin

Good or bad I can take it.

Today is a day that i would call a day of thinking. You are coming home today, from you trip. And i really dont know how to akt. It`s been almost a month sens i saw you and i have been thinking alot. Like why dident you call if it ment so mutch? Why did you just started to akt like a nobody? You give me 2 different sides of you, some days you are wonderful and you show me that you really like me, You take me home, to your famaily, you let me have dinner with you, you introduse me to pepole that means so mutch to you and you even kiss me infront of them. But then now and before you were leaving you stared akting werid and when i askt you said that you only had a bad day, okay but this was kind of a long time. You told me you were afriad to get in to a relationskip but thats arigth almost every guy is like that. But dont blame me for that, you started the hole thing and maby i`m not here for you to finish it. Ì mean why would i wait for someone how akt like he care one day and then another he dont. I`m not wort that kind of skit, you need to think and then say. I like you now but I also now that I can`t like a persen that make me sad and hurt. Cus that is what you did, you hurt me. If you just could talk to me, tell me your feelings, so that i could understand whats going on in you head. I can read your minds you know. Just speak out! Good or bad I can take it.